It seems that I’m a Wanted Man, though posters there are none.
But, as a husband and a dad, my tasks are never done.
It starts before I leave work – I get texts upon my phone:
“Get some milk”, “Pick me up”; I think I need a clone.

I love my wife, my kids and cat, but they are a bit demanding;
I’ve got to fix a toilet seat and paint the stairs and landing.
Our bedroom door’s all squeaky and the kitchen shelves are sagging;
The printer wants new toner and the PC needs defragging.

“Look at my dance!”, “Watch this clip!”, “Take me into town!”
“Can you go upstairs, my sweet, and take the curtains down?”
The cat’s meow adds to the list and I look down at my puss;
I’ve fed him twice, played hide and seek and still he wants a fuss.

I guess that I could stay up late, playing on the ‘puter:
A hero on a tricky quest in a fun first person shooter…
(But a six AM alarm is hard when you’re up ’til daft o’clock;
So I’d rather get an early night than risk that nasty shock).

There is one place that I can go to find some solitude;
The door is locked and I relax, no-one can now intrude.
Out of sight means out of mind; it seems that it’s true:
The only ‘me time’ that I get is reading on the loo.


Written for a poetry competition on the subject of solitude, 3 March 2016



17 thoughts on “Solitude

    1. Thanks Mister Al πŸ˜€
      There are times in a man’s life when he just needs a quiet poo.
      Usually once a day (if he’s getting the right amount of fibre).
      To be fair, it’s nowhere near as fraught as it used to be – teenagers tend to stay out of your way and in their rooms in exactly the kind of way that toddlers don’t. So having been there some years ago I know where you’re coming from…

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I’ve written in the loo, laptop on my knees πŸ˜€
    Clever poem that many writers will relate to. It explains why I didn’t start writing until I was 50. I admire every single writer who tries to pen a few words with a job and kids. Kudos to you!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I giggled out loud reading this, while leaning on the inside of the bathroom door. I too feel your pain, and my child can’t even walk yet!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. What a perfectly apt place to read it! Glad you enjoyed it! πŸ™‚
      Parental privacy comes to a shocking end once the little ones get mobile and can open unlocked toilet doors, so be prepared… πŸ˜‰

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Haha you have summarised life for many people. For some reason I started reading it in a Ray Winstone accent.
    The solitary read on the crapper seems strangely universal in its appeal. Something in something out lol

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Respect! You manage to write such good stuff with so much take care of,while I lie around the house all day (for a few months. Until college starts ) and yet I can hardly put pen to paper

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Weeeell, I may have exaggerated things just a little… But yeah, working, having a family & domestic chores do tend to get in the way of sitting down to write!


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